In a Wilson moment....

Clinging on to the thoughts of my wife and son, I quickly ran downstairs with my travel bag and in to the garage. I hopped right in to my little convertible BMW Z3 and pull in 100 MPH on the black tar with the tires peeling of the road. Exactly ten minutes later I was at the airport. I quickly park the car in perfect position in the airport garage as if a scene from any 007 movie when the character was in hot pursuit. Normally it's a comfortable twenty minutes drive.

It's definetely Monday morning and the airport terminal was packed with people dressed in business attires and families laughing going on vacations. I moved ahead with determination and went straight to the crowded American Airline International counter. I had never been so impulsive in my life. A very nice young attractive lady with her eyes to match her distinguish blue uniform greeted me with a smile at the counter. I told her I need to be on the next flight out to Hong Kong. She told me to wait a minute while she worked her magic on the keyboard. In a quick moment, she called out my name and seemed to have found the perfect arrangment for me. Her smile was equally as eager as my racing heart, excited by the prospect of flying across the pacific to embrace my love ones. I knew with her confident smile this was the right decision to make and without hearing the price, I gave her my American Express.

Suddenly, a loud noise came about. It's like a fire alarm and someone began speaking on the PA system announcing something I coudn't quite make out what it is. It's all a bit hazy and blurry. I tried to gather myself but couldn't really focus. I slowly began to be able to hear clearly what the annoucer was saying. He was annoucing today's weather and the fire alarm was not a terrorist attack but rather my alarm clock next to my bed trying to wake me up from my dream. It's a good thing it was just a dream because an impulsive trip like that would have cost me an arm and a leg. I would need American Express Platinum Plum card just to get the American Airline Attendant to smile back at me if I were to make such a purchase which I do not have.

I realize the dream was over and it's time to get up. Today is the 15th day of being alone at home. I have already made it half way and just another 13 days they will be back. As I was driving in my old Maxima (instead of the BMW in my dream), I recalled flipping through the channels last night and came across the movie "Cast Away". The theme song echoed throughout my mind. I recalled telling my wife the same thing everytime when I go on business trips, "I will be right back" and recalled the time when I was alone in hotel rooms surfing my flickr album just so I could feel that they are close to me. There was a great scene in the movie where Tom Hanks tried to find a source to keep on breathing.While he was on a deserted island, he turned on and off to conserve what little battery life is left in his flashlight in order to see a picture inside a pocket watch given to him by his love. The contrast was later brought on in the film again when he spent the first night in his hotel room after coming back where he laid next to the side of bed and did the same, flashing on and off still overlooking the picture of his love one.

How short life can be if we allow it to just drift by like the currents of the ocean. They are gone for 28 days and yet I have lived the first 15 days longing that it's the 28th day. I am just glad that there will be a 28th day for us but for the tragedies that had happenned in Myammar and China, that separation will last much longer than just 28 days.

For those who can afford to help the victims of the recent tragedies in Myammar and China, please click on the links below and find out how you can help.

1) Myammar Cyclone Relief

2) China EarthQuake Relief

The tree at the edge of Heaven

It was another trip to the airport and this time instead of myself flying off, it's our little boy along with his mommy. It's the first time for mommy taking our little almost five years old very energetic boy across the pacific to visit his gramps by themselves. The flight time alone is almost 19 hours long with the first stop in Narita, Japan then after a 3 hours lay-over their journey continues on a different flight for another 4 hours before they arrived in Hong kong. The first leg of the trip will take up to fourteen hours and Mommy is stuck with a very easily bored little boy. She had anxieties just thinking about this first fourteen hours. They will be stuck in tight quarters and she would have to come up with things to distract or entertain this little guy. Mommy was quite creative and directed me to wake up very early the day of the flight. I was in charge of getting our little boy tired so that he would be willing to sleep on the plane. On the day of the flight, I woke up at 5.30am and proceeded to wake our little boy up. It's 5.45am, our little boy still have not gotten up but nervous mommy sure did. Finally, I had to enticed him with yummy breakfast buritos at the local breakfast diner in order to get him to open his first eye. The second eye finally open when I mentioned hash browns and by the time I mentioned Chocolate Milk, he was already dress all by himself. After breakfast, we went to the park and play a little catch foorball. I play both quarterback and cornerback while he was the wide receiver. I threw him the ball then chased him down and tackle him.....He loves it! After several throws and tackles, he looked tired and I was almost dead! We went home to a shower and then we were off to the airport to catch the noon flight out.

Mommy had to make this trip because Grandpa was recently diagnosed with brain cancer. Fortunately the cancer was detected at a very early stage. He is expected to make a full recovery but couldn't escaped the rigors of a new form of Chemo Therapy. Mommy wanted to bring the eating machine little boy to Hong Kong to serve as comfort therapy. She wanted to cheer grandpa on during this month of daily chemo therapy treatments. Mommy even bought matching caps for the hairless grandpa and grandson.

Upon returning home, I found myself wondering around the empty hallways and rooms in our house. I went down to the kitchen to fix myself lunch and found a new kind of freedom I didn't have. I was able to eat anything I want. No one there to tell me this is not good for you or no one there to eat my food outright! I was all alone and loving it. For the first time in our seven-year marriage I was single again. I was by myself. The first day of being single quickly ended as the night fell. I was out like a zombie since I had to wake up so early and play tag football with my little boy.

I woke up the next day, ate my self-made breakfast and went to work. Normally, I would have a few phone calls throughout the day from either from my wife or my mischievous little son who loves to prank call daddy. I didn't get any phone calls and soon it was time to go home again. I got home and the hall ways were still empty. I didn't hear the clamoring voice of my son playing with the neighborhood kids or my wife asking me to do something. It was just me. Alone.

I haven't been single for more than seven years. I suddenly find myself with TIME. When I go home, I have to ask myself, what am i going to do....

In these moments of quiet time as I wondered through the noiseless hall ways of our home, I remembered reading to the little guy several months ago and it was the book titled the Giving Tree. The tree and the boy became best friends. The tree always provided the boy with what he wanted: branches to swing from, shade to sit under, apples to snack on, branches to build a house. As the boy grew older and older he required more and more of the tree. The tree loved the boy very much and gave him anything he asked for. In the ultimate act of self-sacrifice, the tree let the boy cut her down so the boy could build a boat in which he could sail across the vast sea. The boy left the tree, now a stump. Many years later, the boy, now an old man, returned and the tree said "I have nothing left to give you". The boy replied that all he needed was a quiet place to sit and rest as he awaited the inevitable. The tree happily obliged.

Tears fall in our lives like leaves from a tree. There are seasons of joy and seasons of solitude to come. Although it is temporary at this moment since they will be back in a month, it is bound that one day we too shall give it our all. The tree is at the edge of heaven overlooking the distant plain hoping it will grow wings like angels or hoping it won't step a foot further and falls off heaven.

Gee...am I sad or what?? I better go to the airport and buy myself a ticket now! Man!!..being single is tougher than I thought.

A Romantic Conversation at the Park - Abbey's Park (Part 2)

Somewhere through the birds chirping, the winds whispering through the perfect morning, or the winding flowing water brooks, I heard my son called out to her name...Abbey!

My son kept calling out that name Abbey..Abbey wait up! She turned around, gave my boy a smirky cute smile and vanished in a moment's blink but only to appear again by the swings. My son seemed to be having the time of his life and they looked like a pair of butterlies flying around without a care in the world. The innocence and joy of childhood radiates over this picture perfect day. These are moments that I cherish as I remember in my own past that I too had an Abbey in my life. A friend that was willing to give up her own favorite last piece of chocolate chip cookie.

A motherly voice suddenly called out from a distance. It appeared that it was time for Abbey to go home but she seemed reluctant and kept on pleading to stay longer by the sandbox. Her mother approached and she gently but graciously told her little jewel, "you have 10 more minutes and then it's time to go." The little girl nodded with a smile followed by a big thank you hug to her mother. Her mother had a well-to-do distinguished look to her demeanor. She was a tall slender lady with the same smile as her daughter. 10 minutes quickly passed and her mother reminded Abbey that it's time. At this moment, she noticed that my son's face has made a sad turn as well. The mother turned to me and said, you must be daddy, would you like to take your son and stop by our home for a cup of tea or hot chocolate? My husband is home doing some yardwork. I really didn't want to impose and felt a little awkward being strangers to them but before I could say anything, my son jumped up from the sandbox and said..YES YES..I love hot chocolate. Can we daddy...pleaseeee! and I couldn't say no after that display of enthusiasm but truthfully I couldn't resist a good cup of hot chocolate as well.

Another short peaceful strolled, we arrived at her home. The dad was out in the front yard fixing the swing by the great big tree on their front porch. We quickly greeted one another and exchange plesantry hand shakes. Her mom invited all of us in and we sat down for a cup of hot chocolate. We both took a sip from our creamy chocolates with whip cream on top almost as synchronized as father and son can be. Suddenly we heard giggles between the mother and daughter and we were a little puzzled by their amusement. The mother handed me a napkin and proceed to help my son wipe off the hot chocalate whip cream mustache he had all over his mouth. We both looked at each other with innocent silliness and laughed the moment off.

After sipping our favorite drinks, the parents invited us to a quick tour around the house. It is a beautiful house decorated with colonial antiques of all sorts. I started noticing some of the family pictures they had out on top of the fireplace. I noticed there was a picture in particular that there were two little girls of similar age. I asked the mother is this your daughter too?..She had a slight pause in her tone and said yes...that's Abbey. I didn't notice the mother's pause at first and told my son to come over to see the picture. My son saw the picture and said, yeah that's Abbey. At this moment, the little girl whom my son was playing in the sandbox said with a smile, yea..that's my twin sister Abbey. I turned to the mother a little bit embarassed having called the little girl the wrong name all this time thinking she is Abbey.

The mother was very gracious and told me her little girl that my boy was playing in the sandbox is named Abigail or Abi for short. Abbey on the other hand was her twin sister. I then told the mother that my son perhaps had played with Abbey before in the park and that he named the park Abbey's park. My son was obviously very fond of Abbey but somehow about six months ago, she stopped going to the park until today he saw Abi thinking she was her sister Abbey. At that moment, I noticed that the mother was trying hard to hold back a little tear and then she said, "We lost Abbey to a rare form of cancer about 3 months ago. Today was the first time her twin sister Abigail was willing to go out to their favorite place to play!" The favorite place she was talking about is what my son calls "Abbey's park."

My son later went home and asked me, daddy...where is Abbey? I told him, think of the time you played with her in the park and remember her in your heart and that's where Abbey is.

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Well.....Some parts of this story are simply imagination or fictional but I did want to explore the question of death. Death is going to be an eventual question that our children will ask us someday especially when there are deaths in the family or even having their first pet die. What WOULD we say or tell them?

Just last year, one of our family members was lost to illness. He is not close to my little boy and that's only because of distance and he's been too ill to spend time with him. He had a rare form of Alzheimer's disease that robed him for the better part of the last five years. His condition slowly eroded and eventually that fateful day came and gone. My wife flew half way across the country to attend the funeral. Had we lived closer to one another and if he didn't have Alzheimer's disease, I know my son would love him. He would have called him Ohio Grandpa. To end this story, my son did meet two girls at the park named Abbey and there was a death. The death happened twenty something years ago to one of my best childhood friend. I remember as we buried him in the cemetary park that beautiful fragrant blooming day, another little girl fighting back her tears, and a classmates of ours said these words to him as we laid him to rest.
"You will always be in my heart."